the Protein Berry Pizzazz...

...at Jamba Juice. I discovered this with Tom's help on Saturday, 10/22. That was the day we reunited with my high school buddy Shari!

Anyway, this is one awesome smoothie. The original size contains 20g of protein, 110% USRDA of calcium, 15% USRDA of iron, 100% Vit. C...! The best part is that it's vegan!

I've had it twice so far this week....

successfully unsuccessful

Well, despite my best efforts, I've been sicker than a dog these past couple of weeks! My days so far have been like so: drag my tired booty out of bed, nearly fall face first on keyboard at work, come home and lay down on the couch wishing the waves of nausea would just go away, fall asleep on couch, move up to the bed where, again, I start wishing for the waves of nausea to calm!

On October 12 or 13, I got a call from the doctor's office telling me they had good news: I'm pregnant (uh, hullo. I think we knew that already) and that they believed I was 5 weeks and 6 days along on October 11. That means, today we're officially 8 whopping weeks on!

I've been aching to run but, by the end of the day, I feel so awful it's hard to find the motivation to don the running clothes and get out there.

Tom and I did plot out a 2-3 mile course around the 'hood which we've now run twice. My running pace has definitely slowed...and my breathing is definitely more labored, but running still feels pretty good at the end of it all and I'd really like to keep up with 3-4 mile runs 3 times a week. So far, keeping to this schedule has been very tough, but maybe once the nausea lets up I'll be able to stick to it.

< gurgle gurgle >

It's about that time when I start to feel super duper green -- when the sun is just about ready to come up in Manila....From now until bed-time, I'll feel nauseated to the n'th degree, but i won't actually puke. I'm actually glad I don't puke because I want little zyggy to partake in whatever I've eaten so far...and it's been so difficult lately to eat.

I'm constantly hungry yet when I get food, I sometimes can't eat it. I'm worried that I'm not getting enough calories and therefore not enough nutrients, and I sometimes force myself to peck at whatever food is in front of me, but I often can't eat that much.

Believe it or not, I couldn't even finish my tapioca pudding last night -- and I love tapioca pudding!

I'm also getting super sick of fig newmans, but right now, it's the only snack i have at work. Yes. All sorts of foods are becoming unappealing. I'll love it one minute -- or at least think it sounds appealing, and the next i'll think it's putrid. Nuts. today's potatoes at Zachary's. Tamale pie. Bagels (oh, no!). Any strong-smelling food.

This morning, I had a banana and half an apple with peanut butter for brekky. Then, for lunch, I went to Zach's for a bowl of oatmeal and a side of potatoes (couldn't finish the potatoes).

Last night we read that today zyggy's fingers and toes are now separated (we're at 8 weeks exactly if the 10/11's ultrasound reading is accurate!). If zyggy is a boy, he's producing testosterone to form his little gonads.

Right now, I've got my money on zyggy being male. But, we'll see...!

Ultrasound Day

Ok. Today, I'm feeling a little queasy, despite my vow to not have morning sickness (or anytime of sickness). I'm not sure if it's something I ate -- which is, so far, a cinnamon raisin swirl bagel (40 mg of calcium, 11g protein) with peanut butter, a banana, some Stonewall's vegan Jerquee (16% USRDA calcium, 27% iron, 14g of protein), some Silk lemon soy yogurt (30% USRDA calcium; 6% iron; and 4g of protein!) and an Odwalla's Vanilla Almondo Super Protein (35%USRDA calcium, 100% Vit B12, and 10g of protein).

That puts my daily intake from food so far at:

• calcium - ~71%
• protein - 39g (required 60g)
• iron - ~40%

Today is also Ultrasound Day, so I have to imbibe 40 oz. of water between now (3:06pm) and 4pm and hold it in my itty bitty bladder until post-ultrasound.

So, maybe I'm queasy cuz I'm squishing around like an over-sopped sponge....I dunno.

In any case, I can't wait to see the baby. I hope we will be assured tht zyggy is a-ok in there -- happy and content despite all of the disruptions its father causes it.

After today, if all is well, we will have a much better idea of how far into development zyggy really is.

Folic acid

The bad news is that ~4,000 babies in the US are born with nerual tube defects due to a lack of folic acid in the first 4 weeks of development. The great news is that folic acid is inherent in all green vegetables and is also added to breads, grains, cereals, and even orange juice! Eating a well-rounded vegan diet (as Tom and I usually do) should mean our little zyggy will be a-ok!

I was happy to read that artichokes, asparagus, avocado, broccoli, chickpeas, lentils, spinach, squash and tempeh are all listed as folic food powerhouses!

In fact, as I read more and more of Your Vegetarian Pregnancy, my confidence in continuing to eat vegan increases. I feel certain that we can meet all of little zyggy's nutrional needs without having to resort to going back to a putrid diet of meat.

I feel really good about eating broccoli with tofu, tempeh, and kale and coconut over brown rice (today's lunch at the Asian Rose) knowing that this is exactly the food little zyggy needs and exactly the food I prefer!

Source: Your Vegetarian Pregnancy by Dr. Holly Roberts, Board-certified Ob/Gyn

post-run

I finished the yesterday's 10K in just under an hour, which puts my race pace at pretty much a 10-minute mile!

During the entire race, I tried to make sure my heart rate stayed under 170 bpm and tried to remain mindful of being too stressed or feeling too strained. At points, Christina was ahead of me and I didn't try to catch up. Anyway, I wouldn't have been able to even if I had tried (that girl can run!)...!

Today, I'm relieved that there is no spotting -- I think I would have worried that the run had an adverse effect if I did spot.

I'm also noticing today (and yesterday) that my jeans are already snug in the belly. Is it water retention? Is it more blood flow? Am I further along than we thought (though I keep replaying this possibility and don't see the logic of it given the timing of my LMP)??

Tom and I read the entry in the Pregnancy Journal for Day 45 and discovered that today little zyggy has nipples! Oh, my! What a weird think to develop now, huh? Also, 2 little zyggies can apparently fit inside a 2-liter bottle cap.

Anyway, I walked to work today -- am realizing that it seems to be taking quite a bit of energy to walk these days -- and picked up a vegan Peach Pleasure Jamba Juice before heading in to work. I got it with a femme boost. I thought this would be a good idea until I read the nutrional panel for the boost.

The femme boost provides 100% USRDA for iron. I'm hoping that this iron, coupled with the iron from the pre-natal vitamin, doesn't constitute "too much." Jamba Juice's site has a warning that says accidental overdoses of iron is "the leading cause of fatal poisoning" in children under 6. I don't know yet how this affects babies....

On fatigue

Oh yes, I am tired. I think we slept more than 8 hours last night -- we went to bed before midnight and I only woke up at 7:50am, but I am feeling the fatigue. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to walk to work today.

On running and being pregnant

I'm relieved to catch snippets that running is not bad for pregnancy -- in fact, it can be quite healthy for the baby and mom. I've ordered a copy of Runner's World Guide to Running and Pregnancy from Amazon and can't wait until it arrives. In the meantime, I'm planning on running that 10K in San Jose on Sunday, 10/9 (at a moderate pace and with a promise to myself that I will slow down at the first sign of core-temperature increase!).

I will probably write more on this topic as time goes on....

Snack of the Day

Fig Newmans: "figs have more fiber than most fruits and vegetables, more potassium than bananas, and lots of calcium and iron." Besides that, they're fat-free.

8:26am

I spent some time last night reading Your Vegetarian Pregnancy and some time time this morning re-reading bits of The Pregnancy Journal. On Day 7, implantation in the uterus occurs, the process of which will actually displace tissue and cause spotting: "it's evidence that your pregnancy has begun".

That day, I really did think my dot was gonna start, but I only had some spotting. I remember commenting to Tom that I was having a really strange period and I wasn't sure why it was so weird, but I speculated it was, again, due to stress surrounding the wedding planning.

Around this time, I also vaguely began to wonder if we might be pregnant...after all, I was off the pill and we weren't using any form of protection anymore....But, mostly I shrugged off the pregnancy idea and put it off on stress.

Little did I know. Now that I do, I see that day so differently. It was such an insignificant day -- another one of those days where I wandered around in a relative haze -- until I read what was happening inside me. Our little zyggy took root that day, kicking off the start of one of the most important events in our lives....

my pre-natal care vitamin

Introducting Ethex NatalCarePlus, my current pre-natal care vitamin. This contains the recommended 1mg of Folic Acid and contains no artifical colors or dyes or sweeteners. Thumbs up to that! Also, the Vitamin A is input as Beta Carotene (dervied from plants and converted to Vitamin A by your body) rather than retinol. Retinol is derived from fish oils and animal livers which, when taken in high doses, can actually lead to birth defects. Large amounts of beta carotene, on the other hand, will only result in you turning a little yellow or orange. Clearly the plant form is superior and I'm glad this is the form I'm taking, not only because I'm vegan, but because it's a zero-risk form of Vitamin A.

I'm a fertile myrtle, too

This morning (Thursay, 10/06/2005), the home pregnancy test results were confirmed. I'm definitely preggers. It's so overwhelming.

When I first took the test on Monday night (10/3), I was so anxious. I'd been wandering around in something of a haze, thinking I should have had my period (shouldn't I?), but probably it's just stress that's delaying it all. At the same time, I couldn't help but wonder why my tummy felt a little fuller and my jeans were just a hair more snug. I thought maybe I wasn't doing enough abs exercise, maybe I wasn't running enough....After all, I wasn't having morning sickness.

Then, on Monday, I non-chalantly mentioned to Heather that Tom and I were picking up an EPT -- but that I was pretty sure stress was just delaying things. When I got home that night, I decided to take the test. I was a little nervous -- wasn't sure how unhappy I would be if I tested negative -- and while I washed my hands, the results came in: "Pregnant".

Tears came to my eyes as I walked out of the bathroom and into the kitchen to show Tom. I think he's happy, but I couldn't be certain. I felt he tried to make the best of things: told me he'd have to use the word "prenatal" a lot and so on.

From there on out, I was cautiously happy. I read up on the web to see what the accuracy of such tests were and discovered there are far fewer false positives than false negatives.

Apparently there's a hormone called hCG (Human Choriogonadotropin) that women only produce when they are pregnant because it's only present in the placenta.

So, it certainly seemed I was likely to be pregnant. But, there is such a thing as "chemical pregnancy" -- when there is a fertilized egg but it is rejected because the body believes it cannot grow to be a viable embryo. I think this is basically a miscarriage.

Anyway, I didn't have the courage to call the doctor on Tuesday though I did call Heather to tell her the test results. Both she and Tom were strongly encouraging me to call the doc...I was spotting on Tuesday and Wednesday, but read on the web that this is also common in the early stages of pregnancy, due to a higher volume of blood in the woman's body, so I didn't think it was immediately necessary to call the doctor. Besides that, I was still a little freaked out. I didn't want to believe I was pregnant only to have the doc tell me the test really was a false positive (even though, rationally, I knew I only got the positive result -- and immediately, at that!-- because hCG was in my pee).

But, finally, I made the appointment. And I had it this morning at 9:15am. Heather went with me. Boy, but they just had me pee in a cup so the test couldn't have been different from the home test.

While I waited for the doctor to come back with the results, I was nervous. Again, I wasn't sure how I'd feel if it were negative. Would I be disappointed or relieved?

When she did come back to tell me it was positive, I was happy but also anxious. Holy smokes. Now what? I don't know the first thing about being pregnant or about parenthood. None of my theorizing was coming to the rescue...and I somehow doubt it will. I find myself completely unprepared for the experience of pregnancy -- and terribly anxious that I am. Shouldn't I be an old pro by now (having read and thought about this stuff for so long?)....I may as well have not thought about anything at all before this moment!

Now, I'm still worried. What about my job, what about my health, what about the things that might go wrong? What about Tom and I? Are we ready for this challenge?

I really do want this baby to be healthy and happy. I want Tom to be happy, too.

Doc says I shouldn't do anything too strenuous, nothing to up my core body temperature cuz that would be bad for the baby's development. I guess I can't run anymore. Certainly, the marathon is out.

I think I will need to enroll in yoga or some other sort of exercise I can do while I'm pregnant. I still want to run after s/he is born.

They date the term from the date of the last period -- which is set at 8/26 -- though technically fertilization probably occurred about 2 weeks later. Based on this current best guess, the due date is 6/3/2006, but next week's ultrasound should have more conclusive results....We'll then see if everything is ok -- if the baby is positioned correctly, if it looks ok, how far into development it is, etc.

I wait with bated breath.

And right now, Tom is giving a presentation and won't find out for another 45 minutes or so. I hope he will be ok with the news.

3:09PM

I just finished reading a few things on the discussion forum on vegfamily.com and then discovered veganpregnancy on blogspot. She's got a due date of 5/4 and they pretty much conceived in the same way Tom and I did -- planned it and it happened immediately. She's young 27. I don't anticipate she'll have any issues...! I sure hope we don't either.

Obviously, I'm obsessed with the news now. I went on Amazon.com and added a pile of pregnancy and pregnancy and fitness books to my wish list and I went to the bookstore to look at books during my lunch. I'm likely to get the running book from Amazon immediately (after I talk with Tom about what books he's interested in reading) and I'm strongly leaning towards heading back to Bookshop Santa Cruz to pick up a couple of the pregnancy books I saw earlier today.

There is a voice in the back of my mind that is always cautioning, cautioning, cautioning: don't get too excited yet, you fool. I'm trying to balance the volume of that voice with the one that's saying: don't be such a pessimist! Good things will happen if you expect them to, and thinking bad things will bad juju you.

I vaccillate between knowing which voice to hear out, but it seems I'm favoring the optimist...

Off to the bookstore.